Ok, Anberlin is AMAZING! How else do you explain lyrics like "I want to be your last first kiss" and "Old enough to know but too young to care" ?!? Not to mention how catchy ALL of their songs are. I randomly catch myself singing Haight Street, and Godspeed, and Breaking, just to name a few. They're very good, and I'm hoping my band might live up to theirs some day. I really do.

First Chapter Of My Greatest Book Yet!!!!!

Ok, I know it's random on here, and I know this sounds like a last chapter, but this is the first chapter to my most recent book, the third in a trilogy that is nearly done and ready to publish. I hope you like!!!!!!!





THE FINALE chapter one

I frowned at myself. Forty years old, and I din't look a day past twenty-two. I studied myself carefully, taking in every detail. Even after all these years, it was still rather hard to beleive.
I saw something move out of the corner of my eye. As I turned back to myself, Stephen wrapped his arms around me. He still looked barely older than I did, at nearly fifty-one, a rather large difference, he still looked young. His hair fell into his eyes and he smiled at me.
I smiled back. Despite the fact that we looked like a new couple, we had been together for twenty years. And in those twenty years we had been through so much. We had fought side by side in countless battles, and won. We got married in secret, and we had six kids of our own.
At the thought of the kids, I choked up. Holding back the tears, I let Stephen pull me away from the mirror. He pulled me over to the bed and sat down. I slowly sat down beside him and looked up at his face. Just looking at him, I knew he knew about what I was thinking. He had seen, and he was wondering the same thing.
I chewed my lip and he took my hand. The silence was heavy, but neither of us dared to speak. We both just wanted to know when they were coming home.
In their absence of nearly six years, Stephen and I had sat and hoped, day after day, that the war would end so that they could come back. We could vaguely remember watching them grow up, but that wasn't enough to satisfy us.
Our oldest would be twenty within the next week, and for all we knew, they had children. We already knew that Raine and Cassandra did, but they were only one of ours. I missed them all, and it broke my heart to be without them for so long. especially because some of them were so young when they left.
Delilah and Adalade were only four when they were sent, but we had to keep them safe, so we let them go. One by one, and in some cases, two by two, we watched them leave, all the while wishing with all of our hearts that they didn't have to go...
Stephen broke into my thoughts. I looked up and across the room and saw a teenage girl. She had wings as black as night, long brown hair, and the bluest eyes. And in her right hand, she clutched a well worn teddy bear, that I remembered quite clearly...
The tears in my eyes became one, and the tears rolled down my cheeks. The girl looked at us together, then one at a time. She dropped the bear, without realizing it, and she made no effort to pick it up as the emotion built on her face.
"Daddy!" She exclaimed, as if she were seven once again. In one huge leaping bound, she ran across the room and pushed herself as close in between us as she could. She whispered, as quietly as she had appeared, "I love you guys..."
The tears began to flow freely. I couldn't contain them anymore. The girl that was sitting here, wedged in between us, was Sophia. She was raised all her life by Aaron, and she thought that we hated her. And she hated us for that.
But in truth we loved her more than words could express, and that's why Aaron raised her. We would have rather her be raised by a freind than to have gotten hurt or worse out on the battlefield.
But sitting there, she knew. She knew how much we had cared from the very beginning. How hard it was for us to let her go, and how hard it was to have her dislike us so. She knew, and in the few seconds that had elapsed, she had apologized for her mistakes, and forgiven us for ours, just by being there.
So I cried, knowing that she loved us, and knowing that our other kids would be back soon, and we would all be together for truly the first time ever.

I was told to update my blog by multiple people. So today, there will be nothing deep on here. There will only be me. Talking.
"I Uupdated it! Hi! Is everone happy now?!"
ok, i'm good. bye!!!!!!

Sometimes when you say goodbye, it seems like you're being left behind. It seems like they left you in the dust, after they swore that they would stay. We've all been there, but we all need to realize that in life, the things that we love come and go, with almost no exceptions...
Saying goodbye is never easy, yet people come and go, some stay forever, and some just don't. Some stab you in the heart, yet you love them anyway, and then you chase behind, when they finally go away. But to say goodbye it takes some courage, some strength of heart and mind. To try and hold the tears back, as you get left behind. The road is long and lonely, but on your journey you will find, though life's not always easy, you're never truly far behind...

Seeing a butterfly on the ground with it's wings crumpled today, I began to cry. I thought of how fragile life is, seeing as last night, a very close friend of mine died. After suffering for almost his entire life, he took his last breath, and his life by his own hand. So young, with so much life before him.
That butterfly reminded me of him, in pain and nearly dead, but not able to fly away. I wished with all my heart that it would get back up and be ok, but of course that didn't happen. So I went back inside and sat at my computer, thinking of how to word what I was feeling. I stared at it for awhile, with nothing coming to my mind. Then a thought crossed my mind. What if I could use this bad experience and use it to help others?
So I started looking up different statistics, thinking maybe if I were to inform people, they might be more skeptical. I also thought I would give them someone to talk to if they needed it, so I created a place for them to do just that on my site http://www.strengthandpassion.webs.com/ so that they can be reassured that life IS worth it. If anyone needs someone to help them through a tough time, I'd be happy to.


Teen Suicide Statistics And Facts:
Suicide is one of the leading causes of death in teens.
About 10 in 100,000 teens kill themselves
Girls are more likely to commit suicide
Every hour and forty-five minutes one young person kills themselves
For every true suicide, there are 50 to 100 more attempts
Between 26% and 33% of adolescent teens that commited suicide had attempted it before.


Suicide is a VERY serious issue. And it is an issue that is very close to me, because of my friend. So PLEASE, PLEASE be wise and don't even THINK that you want to die...

Do each and every one of us have our own wonderland?
A place that we can disappear to when times are tough. A place to make us smile when the tears fall and laugh when we want to scream. A landwilled with magic, where our wildest dreams come true. A place where no matter how hard we think life is, we can do the impossible. Stare certain disaster in the face and overcome it. Any burden we carry is lifted, all the weight of the stress is dropped. Where our thoughts can wander and no one seems to mind. The sky is the limit. Imagination is the key. Take that key and unlock the door. We visit often, when we need to smile and when our world comes crashing down. There are friends and there are foes, and laughter conqers all.
So let's be brave and take the journey, we'll travel far and near, today's the day let's fly away, and soon we'll know no fear.

I was thinking earlier, and when I think, I tend to write... So while I was thinking, I was writing it down in a more pleasing form. The poetry style writing that I am about to share with you is brought to you by the thought that we all seem to grow up too fast...

Welcome to neverland. Go forth and veiw the world as you once did, through the eyes of a child. Run and jump and play in your newly rediscovered forgotten memories of your youth. Because growing up doesn't mean you have to grow up.So don't forget the days spent, as you look back upon your past. Embrace the times you were as free as the wind, hold fast the times you cannot have again. Reenact those days, replay them in your mind. The good times and the bad times and others you will find. And to those who doubt you, prove to them today, that in all those moments gone away, you were the best that you could be, and through the eyes of a child is the best way to see.

So, since you've read this, you're remembering the past. Grab ahold of those memories and don't let them slip away. The past is who you are and if you let that go you let part of yourself go. Forget and you lose yourself... So remember and embrace seeing the world through the eyes of a child, where there is no wrong and stress and hatred is an unknown factor. Love seeing the world as one, as a wonderful place. Cherish that world, and protect it in your memories...